"Wouldn't Bang"

 

I spend most of my time on the Internet, between working at my IT help desk job, perusing how-tos at home, and talking to my far-flung friends and family.  As such, I have developed a fondness for memes of all kind (I'm on a big Advice Animals kick right now).  I have a pretty good sense of humor, and am not easily offended, but I have noticed a trend that is disheartening to me: Wouldn't Bang.

It's cute on the outside - the socially helpless Dweller cites a meaningless flaw as a reason not to have sex with a woman who, let's face it, would never even offer.  The audience has a good laugh because it's obvious that, if it were offered, the Dweller would bang, and in a heartbeat.  These are generally harmless, citing minor flaws in appearance or preference.  However, some speak more deeply, listing failings in nerdiness or technical knowledge - take the example above.

I am a nerd girl.  I use Linux as my sole operating system (not even on a dual boot).  I program, and enjoy it.  I own a PS2, PS3 (original, fully backwards-compatible 20GB with a 500GB hard drive upgrade), Xbox 360, and (hacked) PSP.  I cosplay, Joss is my master now, xkcd is my favorite webcomic, and I play Magic: the Gathering competitively.  By my count, that's five genres of nerdiness thus far - let's go ahead and add that I'm a computer engineering major and that I started working in IT when I was a junior in high school, at which time I was also a percussionist in the band.  Convinced?

These are the types of nerd I am - computer, gaming, Magic, Whedonite, band, anime, engineering.  I am not, however, the following types of nerd: DC, Marvel, Star Trek, Star Wars, WoW, chess... the list goes on.  The point I am trying to make is thus: not everyone is a polymath.  I engage in more genres of nerdery than most people I know - that's how I choose to broaden my horizons - but there remain gaps in my knowledge.

Keeping this in mind, let's look at the following scenario.  A woman is conversing with a man about Linux, a field in which she has much experience.  She makes educated arguments and, in general, displays a working knowledge of the subject matter.  The subject then shifts to computer hardware, and the woman shows again that she knows what she's talking about.  It's obvious that she is intelligent.  Let the conversation take a sudden turn to comics - the man asks her favorite character, and she names Power Girl, making a comment wondering whether Green Lantern would appear as a crossover in a Power Girl film.

She thinks Power Girl is a Marvel creation?

Wouldn't bang.

This woman is trying to create an impression of herself as a knowledgeable nerd, on equal ground with the men around her.  With one step into unfamiliar territory, she has destroyed her work.  Held to incredible standards, she has made a mistake, and her entire reputation has suffered.

A man in the same situation? "Sorry bro, I don't read comics - I got laid in high school instead!" No harm done.

As a female in a male-dominated area, I feel a great pressure.  Don't screw up, or you'll embarrass your entire half of the human race.  Don't make the rest of us look bad.  Make a mistake and give all women a bad name among these men.  "Wouldn't Bang" concerns me because it is an enforcement of these pressures.  Sure, she may be the top programmer in my class, but she hasn't seen Dr. Who?  Wouldn't bang.  So she can quote from any issue of Batman ever written, but she runs Windows?  Wouldn't bang.

I have acute perfectionism forced upon me by my surroundings.  It is one thing to choose yourself held to unattainable standards; that is called drive.  But to have these same standards externally placed on you, when others may choose?  That, readers, is called inequality.